


Leader Messed Up

by thephilosophah



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Multi, Polyamory Negotiations, Polythieves (Persona 5)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-04
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2020-01-04 20:11:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18350879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thephilosophah/pseuds/thephilosophah
Summary: Akira does not communicate effectively enough and makes a mess. Don't be like him. Speak your mind.





	Leader Messed Up

**Author's Note:**

> you know how in-game you can date more than one thief and they won't catch you until valentine's day? i get that that was just for coding convenience, but realistically i'd say that's the least likely way for pego's dates to find out about each other. it's just not giving the thieves enough credit! anyone on this team would figure something like that out much, much sooner.

In the beginning, Akira hadn't intended to be an asshole.

Well, he sometimes starts out with that intention. Usually not, though, and definitely not about this. This is one of the three things he refuses to willingly be an asshole about, and the other two are food and children.

No, Akira started out with nothing but the best intentions.

It was simple enough.

Simple like the way Ryuji's grin always tilts one way, as if symmetry and happiness can't fit on his face at the same time. The way Ryuji slaps Akira on the shoulder or back, often as an excuse to throw an arm around Akira's shoulders. Sometimes it was as simple as calling Ryuji's name, and watching the reaction.

(A head turn, a moment for his eyes to focus -  _ what's up, man? _ )

How could someone simply not fall for him?

Akira had assumed Ann was taken. By Ryuji, even, at some point. Yet the way they treated each other didn't match up to his assumptions, so he figured he'd been wrong. But there were moments - some fleeting, some lingering for hours and hours - that Akira looked at the two of them and wondered if maybe he'd been right, after all. And if they weren't dating at the time, they must've at least dated in the past.

Then Ann would turn to Ryuji with banter in her mouth a little too hurtful to be teasing, and Ryuji would respond in kind. Like any friend would.

Akira resigned himself to living with a question.

And if not Ryuji, Ann must've been taken by Shiho. She speaks about her often enough for it.

_ (She woke up again last week. I talked with her today. I'll visit her after we're done with this. They have her on a strict diet, all I can get for her is soft drinks. I was cheering her from the end of the parallel bars. She looked like it hurt, but she still did it. She's so strong. All I could do was cheer.) _

(Akira had nodded at that retelling, but internally he'd been scoffing. As if cheering wasn't enough. Lord knows he himself would go through anything if Ann was cheering for him from the other side.)

He doesn't blame Shiho at all. She's lucky to have Ann's love.

And, when he asked Ann out and she'd accepted, he'd assumed she'd done so with Shiho's consent, or at least her approval.

He'd assumed she'd done so knowing about him and Makoto. They never tried to be subtle.

And Ryuji, of course. But Akira hadn't outright asked Ryuji out, so maybe the two of them weren't as solid as Akira was with Makoto.

Now, if only Akira could figure out a way to slip through Yusuke's seven layers of obliviousness and social ineptitude...

Makoto had some of that ineptitude too - a byproduct of taking herself too seriously and socializing with adults more than her peers - but her awkward stutters never took more than a question or two to dissipate. And Makoto isn't oblivious.

At least, not about Akira's advances, thankfully.

Yusuke is.

And his artist's ability to weave poetry about the most mundane of things isn't helping in the slightest. He can spin any subject into art. He can take a single greeting from Akira and somehow derail into his own little world of creation that seems so much bigger from the inside than it does on the outside, where it only takes the form of Yusuke hunched over a sketchbook with his hand smearing grey over the page.

(Of course,  _ of course _ Akira had gone with him on that romantic boat ride. Yusuke hadn't looked his way once. Akira contemplated the pros and cons of drowning himself off the boat to escape the torment of being so close to this beautiful yet utterly clueless boy.)

Makoto was by far the easiest to be with. Thank god she asked him to be her fake boyfriend, otherwise he doesn't think he'd have ever graduated to Real Boyfriend quite as smoothly.

Akira knows his subtle bullshit goes over people's heads, sometimes. And if they catch it, they usually respond with equally subtle bullshit, trying to gauge Akira's meaning - it's why Akira isn't sure if he and Ryuji are an item. Half the shit they say could be dirty, and the exact same shit could be bonding bro talk.

Even Akira can tell that Ryuji often tires of it.

Makoto does not.

Makoto takes no shit. Not of the subtle variety or of the double-meaning variety. The moment Akira makes a playful quip, she makes him clarify. And Akira does, gladly. It flusters her if they're in private, but in public it does little more than irritate her.

_ (What do you mean by that? _ Crossing her arms, as if she can tell that he meant to be filthy, but can't figure out exactly how he meant it. Akira gives her as small a smirk as he can manage, careful that no one else sees it in the crowd.  _ I'll let you think about it, Queen. I'll tell you later.) _

Akira likes Flustered Makoto much better than Angry Makoto. Flutered Makoto can blush and play with her hair, kiss him, even, depending on just what happened to fluster her. Angry Makoto is scary and not above physical violence.

He'd thought the two would merge together nicely; blushy and physical sounds good. He thought about it once and then promised himself he'd never think it again outside of his own bed because it did things to him.

(Morgana can smell it on him, he swears. It's terrifying. It makes him paranoid. Who else can smell the filth of his own brain? Sojiro? Iwai? Alibaba? Kawakami, surely? Not Tora, god, please not Tora.)

  
  
  


It's little things that make him blink. That take him by surprise.

Hifumi's hand hovering over the board a second too long, long enough for Akira to take note of and compliment her nails. She smiles a strategist's smile - had she meant for him to notice?

Mishima leaning into Akira's space, thinking he's being subtle in talking about the Phansite. Then bumping Akira's shoulder to stay close even when he moves the conversation elsewhere - does he like being close to Akira?

Could it be that other people can develop crushes on him, instead of him being the one who crushes on everyone that gives him the time of day?

Wild.

  
  
  
  
  


With the battle over, it'd be a waste to call on Personas.

Queen hisses something under her breath. She can't seem to bend her leg at the hip. Standing looks painful.

Joker slots himself under her arm on her uninjured side. "Not healed all the way?"

She grits her teeth. "Unfortunately."

On her other side, Skull hovers. "Can you sit, or?"

Queen hisses at the very thought.

"Here, here," Joker shushes, fumbling for the right medicine. "Okay, this should do it. Bottoms up."

Queen takes it like a shot. For its taste, that's quite the feat. She tests her hip, puts weight on her leg.

Skull deems her healed enough to touch. He taps at her arm. "You good?"

"Yes, it feels fine," Queen nods. She squeezes Joker's shoulders. "Thank you, leader."

Joker squeezes her waist. He checks on the rest of the team, now that no one is hissing in pain.

Mona is on lookout, one eye down the tunnel for trouble, one eye on the team to check on them. Fox is on their other side, though he's looking less for trouble, and more to check them over. Skull steps back from Queen's side.

Panther looks at them with her brow furrowed so much it's visible through her mask.

She's glaring at Joker's arm around Queen's waist.

Wait, had she not known, after all...? Was Joker stupid in assuming Panther had known about his girlfriend as he'd known about Panther's?

He smiles at her, a reassuring little thing made much easier with his own mask.

Panther visibly relaxes. She smiles back.

Okay. Everything's fine.

  
  
  


Mementos gives them no answer to their investigation, that day.

"We didn't even take down anyone's Shadow, damn it," Ryuji huffs, kicking at the ground. "We're making no progress!"

"Are you an idiot?" Morgana snaps. "We reached new depths in Mementos, and we got a bunch of cash and items from minor Shadows! This is enough progress."

"But we're no closer to figuring out who the fuck Alibaba is, or how to do what he wants!"

"I'm with Ryuji," Ann says. She pulls down on one of her pigtails. Akira can almost feel the arrow going through his heart. "If we don't get any ideas on how to find this Futaba Sakura, we're in deep trouble..."

"We don't even know if she has a Palace," Yusuke mutters to himself. He raises his voice to speak to them. "I had sincerely hoped we could've found her today in Mementos. It would be infinitely easier if she didn't have a Palace, after all... but I'm starting to think she does."

Akira chews on the inside of his cheek, glaring at the ground like it can give him the answers they're looking for. "I guess I'll have to ask Sojiro about her..."

"Is that really alright?" Makoto says. "If he hasn't spoken about her yet, then maybe..."

"Maybe she's not a direct relative," Akira reasons. "Maybe she's a cousin or something, and why would he mention someone like that."

Makoto bites her lip, but she doesn't say anything.

Ann does. "I don't want you getting in trouble because you asked the wrong thing. Be careful, okay?"

Akira gives her a warm smile and nods. She mirrors him.

Makoto coughs into her fist. "Alright. Text us afterwards and tell us how it goes."

"I'll make sure he doesn't mess up," Morgana says, snuggling into Akira's bag. "Maybe he won't get any answers, but at least I'll see that he doesn't get kicked out."

"Yeah, that would suck," Ryuji says with a frown.

  
  
  


The woman's hair is grey, but she looks young. She also looks vaguely familiar.

Akira doesn't bother to put his finger on it. What she said is more important than how she looks. He speaks up as soon as she's out the door.

"You're gonna lose custody, Boss?" Akira says. He speaks fast enough that he's not interrupted, but not so much that he sounds frantic. "Of whom? Not me, I hope?"

Sojiro gruffs. "You're fine, kid. This isn't any of your business."

"He's evading," Morgana whispers behind his shoulder. "Ask about Futaba!"

"She said something about a Futaba?"

"I told you this is none of your business! Stop sticking your nose where you're not wanted. I can kick you out anytime, got it?"

Akira absconds up the stairs.

  
  
  
  


"Can I hold your hand?" Makoto whispers.

Akira offers his hand.

"Hello?" Ann calls into the dark of the Sakura house. "Boss? ...Futaba?"

A scream from ahead of them.

Then a scream right into Akira's ear. Makoto drops down, pleading into Akira's thigh with a broken voice.

"Futaba!" comes Sojiro's voice from outside.

Wait shit - from outside? Everyone scrambles to hide.

Unfortunately Akira is pinned in place by his scared-shitless girlfriend.

"Who's there?" Sojiro calls as he steps into the entrance. "Don't you dare move!"

Akira couldn't even if he wanted to. Makoto does not stop her prayer.

Sojiro shines a flashlight on them. "You? What are you two doing here? Wait... is this your girlfriend?"

Akira doesn't answer. He's too busy trying to peel said girlfriend away from his person, now that there's light.

Makoto freezes when he touches her shoulder. Then she immediately stands on her feet.

"B-Boss! I'm sorry for intruding like this!"

The rest of the Thieves come out of hiding.

"We're here too..." Ryuji says. "Sorry."

"Um, we were bringing some sushi and we saw the door was open and we got worried so we came inside--" Makoto says in one breath. "Boss, we saw someone else here, a young girl I believe. Could that have been Futaba Sakura? I'm afraid I may have frightened her, could we possibly--"

"You told Niijima, too?" Sojiro says, glaring daggers at Akira.

Akira shrinks.

Makoto grabs his arm, but maintains eye contact with Sojiro. "Please, sir. Can you explain?"

Sojiro huffs. He rubs the back of his neck. "I guess it's too late to hide now... But let's take this to the shop. If we stay here, she might hear us."

  
  
  


On the way over to Leblanc, Ann walks up next to Akira.

She takes his hand. "You okay?"

Akira keeps his voice as quiet as hers is. "I'm fine. You?"

Ann nudges his side. "I'm asking cause Makoto latched onto you like an octopus... Must've been scary to be on the receiving end of Boss' glare."

"A little," Akira says, nudging her back. "I've been arrested before, you know. A flashlight won't scare me."

Ann takes a deep breath and smiles. "Yeah. Sure looked like it scared Makoto, though."

Akira would snicker if he wasn't dreading the upcoming Futaba conversation so much.

  
  
  
  
  


They've gone to Futaba's Palace twice and are gearing up for a third time when it happens.

It happens because of Mishima, that's the funny thing.

Akira walks with Ryuji and Ann to the station - Makoto will have to meet them at Leblanc later, after she's done with some student counsil thing or another. Yusuke's coming all the way from Kosei, so they'll be waiting anyway.

Makoto suggested they use the waiting time to get some homework done. Ryuji had given her one look and she'd sighed in defeat.

As they're waiting for the train, keeping up enough conversation that it's not obvious that one of the speakers is a cat, Akira spots someone familiar walking to them.

Mishima waves his hand in greeting. "Hello! Are you guys taking the same train?"

"We are," Ann says, cautiously. "Um, what about you, Mishima?"

"Actually, I was wondering if I could borrow Kurusu for a moment? I'll be quick, I promise."

Akira checks the schedule. They have a few minutes before their train arrives. "I don't see why not." He takes a few steps away from his blonds to have some concept of privacy with Mishima. Close enough to be seen, far enough not to be heard. "What's up?"

"Um," Mishima goes, looking between Akira and where they'd left the others. He wasn't this shy in front of them. "Actually, I'm starting to think this might be a bad idea, after all..."

"What would be?"

Mishima scrunches his eyes shut. "I was going to say I like you, wondered if maybe we could go somewhere sometime, but..." He looks back to Ryuji and Ann. "Seems to me like you're on your way to a date already."

Akira looks to them, too. They look back. Morgana gives a long-suffering sigh from his bag.

"Looks like I am," Akira settles on. "Mishima, you seem like a good guy."

Mishima sags his shoulders. Accepting defeat. "Hm?"

"To be honest, I think I might like you too, a little. I'd love to go out sometime. But I'm busy these days. Can I get back to you on that, when I get some breathing room in my schedule?"

Mishima brightens up. "Yes! Yes, of course, whenever you have the time!" He grins, then. "Just don't go and keep me waiting too much, yeah?"

"I'd never," Akira grins back. His train whistles through the tunnel. "That's me. Ah, can I--?"

He hopes Mishima can operate on Subtle. Akira looks down to the other's mouth, makes a vague gesture between them.

Mishima gets it, bless him. "Oh, sure! You're gonna have to get down here, though, I can't reach you."

Akira laughs.

And he kisses Mishima.

A quick little thing, just a short smack. His train is here, after all.

"Bye, Kurusu!" Mishima calls.

Akira waves as he speedwalks over to the platform. "See you!" he calls over his shoulder.

Ryuji and Ann pull him along into the train. Good thing, too, because he gets squished in the crowd.

He and Ryuji have this silent agreement that they have to physically facilitate Ann's train rides when they're with her, so they surround her like parentheses. None of them can talk over the noise of rush hour - they change lines and arrive at Yongen-Jaya without exchanging a word.

"Hey, Akira..." Ann begins, once they're on foot.

"Hm?"

He sees her share a look with Ryuji.

She opens her mouth, but they've reached Leblanc already.

Sojiro puts him on sink duty - just for a little bit, he says - so he shoots Ann and Ryuji an apologetic smile and leaves Morgana with them at a booth.

Yusuke arrives before Akira is done.

Makoto arrives somewhere between Akira hanging his apron and Sojiro dismissing him.

He shoulders his bag, free of Morgana now. "Let's head up, shall we?"

No sooner have they cleared the staircase than Ann's patience runs up.

"What the fuck was that?" she spits, advancing on Akira in a pace that makes him step back.

"The holdup? Sorry for making you wait, I had to help Sojiro--"

"Not that! Before, at the station!"

Akira blinks. "With Mishima?"

"No, with the ticket guy - yes, with Mishima! What the fuck was that!"

Ryuji crosses his arms. "I wasn't gonna say anything, dude, but she's got a point."

"What happened at the station?" Yusuke goes.

"Mishima asked me out-- wait, Ann, are you--"

"And you said yes?!" Ann and Ryuji yell at the same time.

"Keep it down!" Sojiro calls from downstairs.

Makoto grabs Akira's arm. "Akira?"

Akira looks at her carefully controlled face. Then at Ryuji's and Ann's matching frowns. At Yusuke's confused head tilt.

Morgana jumps out the window, the asshole. 

"Okay so, Mishima asked me out," Akira begins slowly. This is no time for Subtle. It seems it was a bad mode of operation to begin with. "And I said yes, and I kissed him."

Makoto cuts off his circulation in that arm. "Excuse me?"

Ann looks at her and her hand tight around Akira's arm and-- "No way."

Akira clenches his jaw.

He hadn't intended to be an asshole.

"Oh shit," he manages.

_ "Oh shit?  _ That's all you have to say for yourself?" Ann growls. "What, do you not even care about me?"

Makoto lets him go like he burned her. "What?"

Ryuji hisses between hiseen his teeth. "Man, no way. No effin' way."

"Yes way?" Akira says, with the slightest stutter. "This isn't how I thought this would go."

"How the fuck  _ did you _ think this would go?" Ann hisses. "D'you think I'd be spitting rainbows that you're dating someone else, too?"

Makoto's jaw drops. "You asked Ann out while you were dating me?"

"Yes," Akira says. He wants to put his hands up to placate them but that sounds like a bad idea on all fonts. "I thought you knew-- I was stupid to assume, I'm sorry."

"You were stupid in general!" Ann grits out. She's fighting tooth and nail not to shout. "What the fuck were you thinking?"

Akira just takes another step back. He's still trying to string words together when Yusuke speaks up.

"I'm terribly confused," he says, "what's happening?"

"Akira is a goddamn cheater is what's happening," Makoto growls. "Do you even care to explain yourself?"

"I do, I do," Akira hurries to say. "I need a minute - fuck, this is terrible..."

"This is terrible?  _ You're _ terrible!" Ann says. "You fucking dick!"

"Seriously dude," Ryuji goes. He shouldn't frown like that, Ryuji should never have to frown like that. "Like, I know we're supposed to be ride or die but this is seriously messed up, man... I can't even back you on it."

"I know, I fucking know!" Akira says, raking a hand through his hair. "You think I  _ wanted _ to hurt you? I want to explain but I can't words very well right now! What do you want me to  _ do,  _ Ryuji?  _ What?" _

Ryuji punches him in the gut.

Hard.

As in, Akira doubles over and coughs for his life, hard.

"Ooh, that's actually a good idea," Ann goes, then punches him in the shoulder, bent over as he is.

Thankfully she misses the nerve so he retains feeling in that arm, but it still hurts like hell.

He struggles to straighten up - surely Makoto's blow will hurt more. He catches her eye for only one moment before--

"Oh shit," he barely gets his glasses off his face--

\--Makoto backhands him hard enough that he must be sporting welts now.

He rolls his jaw as it hangs.

"...Okay, that felt good," Makoto says. "Now I'm willing to give you that minute you needed to explain yourself."

Ann hums in agreement. She shakes her hand out.

Akira breathes deep. He puts on his glasses. "...You're right. I'm sorry. Makoto, I should've asked you before I tried asking someone else out, much less Ann, who's both of our friend. And Ann... I... I thought-- I genuinely thought you knew about me and Makoto. We're not exactly hiding. And aren't you with Shiho?"

Ann frowns. "With Shiho? No, you thought-- with Shiho?"

Akira blinks. "Wait, you're not? But you talk about her all the time..."

"I'm not," Ann says. Final. 

Akira hangs his head. "Yeah, I see the problem here. You guys know me, you know I don't really say things straightforward, so I thought... No, this is all on me - I'm sorry." He picks his head up to look at Ryuji.

Ryuji, bless his soul, gets it. "Whu-- me?"

"Yeah. I just-- It was never explicit with you, I didn't straight-up ask you out or anything, so maybe... Maybe you don't feel like getting an apology, but..."

"Hold on a minute," Ann says. "Never explicit-- what the hell did you guys do? Wait." She squints between Akira and Makoto. "What, are you _ fucking _ her too?"

Akira shoots her a glare. He's never thought he'd be angry at Ann, and yet. "You can't ask me that."

"No, you're my boyfriend! A cheating ass at that, but this concerns me!"

"You don't ask that," Akira snarls. "You can't ask me that."

Ann leans back, blinking rapidly. "...Fine. You're right on that one, at least." She crosses her arms.

"Excuse me," Yusuke says. He's taken a few steps back from everyone else. "Must I be here for this? It seems to me like Morgana had the right idea - this doesn't concern me, after all, and it looks like we've derailed enough that we won't be going into any Palaces today."

Akira stares at him and tries, tries his damn hardest to get the thought across. He can see the light bulbs turning on over everyone's heads - Ann's first, then Ryuji's, and though it takes her a while, eventually Makoto's light bulb lights up as well.

Yusuke's lightbulb remains dark.

Akira is shit at telepathy, apparently. "Yusuke, this concerns you."

"How do you mean?"

Akira could  _ scream. _ "Because I like you, too."

Yusuke blinks. "Excuse me?"

"I like you too! I like everyone in this room, I crush so fucking easily I wanna punch myself in the face sometimes, and I know, I  _ fucking know _ I can't go around dating everyone behind each other's backs-- I'm sorry. I really thought you guys knew, but apparently I had taken my assumptions to be facts and fucked up majorly." He sighs. "You're right. We're not going to any Palaces today. Fuck. Okay, if you guys wanna leave - go, I won't keep you." He shuffles away from the staircase. "Looks like we could all use some time away from each other right now."

  
  
  


mishima: hey

akira: hey yourself

mishima: i know we didn't have much time at the station today, but like

mishima: that was a nice kiss

akira: yeah i liked it too

mishima: so how's your schedule looking?

akira: i suddenly have at least 30 hours to myself but you probably won't want to hang out with me after i tell you why

mishima: wow way to be a cryptid

mishima: come on man what could you possibly have done?

akira: looks like i've made myself a cheater

akira: sorry that was loaded phrasing. what i meant was that i messed up big time with the people i was dating so now none of them are talking to me and my guess is you don't wanna talk to me either

mishima: scuse me you what

akira: i cheated on them with each other fuck what do you expect me to say???

mishima: ???sakamoto and takamaki???

akira: what no

akira: makoto and ann.

mishima: makoto whomst

akira: makoto niijima

mishima: you're. dating the student council president.

akira: i was. right now it's up in the air.

mishima: okay didn't think THAT rumor was true

mishima: what other rumors about you are true??

mishima: are you sleeping with a teacher? did you kill a man?? do you secretly smuggle weapons??

akira: no no and you're gonna have to be more specific.

mishima: you're smuggling weapons?

akira: they're model guns.

mishima: you're smuggling model guns.

akira: i legally buy them and then gift them to my friends.

akira: who right now might not want to be my friends because, i may have mentioned, i cheated on half of them.

mishima: ok so you're NOT dating sakamoto? you sure??

akira: god i wish

akira: but no, not really

mishima: how did you manage to get into such deep shit

akira: because im a fucking dumbass who thought others would draw the same conclusions i did

akira: fuck im such an idiot

akira: i've explained everything to them now, but they haven't talked to me since

mishima: since?? i just saw you with sakamoto+takamaki this afternoon together

akira: yeah i explained after

akira: so i've only been marinating in my misery for a couple of hours but my cat isn't back home yet either so the little anxiety demon in my head is doing the chimichanga

akira: actually the reason i ended up spilling what i didn't think was a secret is cause of you, mishima.

mishima: ??

akira: cause i kissed you at the station. and they saw.

mishima: oh

mishima: oh shit i'm so sorry i didn't mean to cause you trouble!

akira: its. whatever

akira: that wasn't your fault anyway

akira: and i can't imagine how much of a shitshow my love life would've devolved into if i left that any longer

akira: shit this is why people say communication is the key to healthy relationships don't be like me kids

mishima: no i'm

mishima: i'm pretty sure i established myself quite openly at the station

akira: huh

akira: yeah come to think of it, you stated your feelings, intentions and second-guesses very effectively into very few words

akira: what the hell i'm supposed to be the one quiet and laconic

akira: don't steal my brand

mishima: haha i don't think that's quite it

mishima: i think you're just quiet in general

mishima: you leave a lot to the imagination. you don't really say much, kurusu

akira: fuck

akira: why couldn't i have met YOU first when i got here

akira: you would've made my life so much easier

mishima: stoooop

akira: no i mean it

akira: you talk very clearly and leave absolutely nothing implied, why did i ever think the opposite was a good idea??

akira: i should've hung out with you more before this mess happened

akira: fuck

mishima: haha you're swearing so much! your inner sakamoto is showing

akira: yeah

akira: god the fucker is the most emotionally smart person i've ever met and i still managed to fuck things up while having him for a best friend

akira: you'd think his feel smarts would've rubbed off on me, but no.

akira: i was born a dumbass, and a dumbass i will die

mishima: don't say that

mishima: i mean, okay, i may not be no sakamoto, but look at this chat convo, right?

mishima: seems to me like you got some more "feel smarts" now than you did at the start of it

akira: hey mishima i love you

mishima: yeah i'm sure

akira: sorry that i can't date right now

akira: besides i'm sure hearing my damn mess was enough to discourage you from me

mishima: there you go again

mishima: don't assume how i feel!

akira: shit

akira: thanks for listening um, was that too much?

mishima: no. sounds like regular teenage drama to me

mishima: i'm still interested. come talk to me when you sort your business out, okay?

akira: .

akira: yeah

akira: okay

mishima: okay :)

  
  
  


Morgana crawls in through the window.

"Oh, _ there  _ you are," Akira exhales. "I was worried sick."

"I was only gone a few hours," Morgana huffs. "And besides, the last thing I wanted was to be here when _ that _ wrecking ball came smashing through the building."

Akira ducks his head. "I guess that's fair."

Morgana shakes his head. "You're hopeless. My gentlemanly nature makes me worry for you, you know?"

"I feel like I've stooped to new lows, if you're the one lecturing me about relationships."

Morgana licks his paw and rubs it over his ear. "I think you've officially lost any authority you might've had about relationships."

Akira groans and faceplants onto his desk.

  
  
  


ann: are we broken up now?

makoto: Excuse me?

ann: with akira. did we break up?

makoto: I guess neither of us said anything of that sort.

makoto: And he sounded like he'd rather continue pursuing a relationship with both of us.

ann: hm

makoto: How come Akira isn't online, anyway? Usually he responds after the third message.

ryuji: look th dude just realized just how majorly he f'd up ok give him some time

makoto: You're not taking his side, are you?

ryuji: f no

ryuji: cheatings terrible

ryuji: im jst bluescreening over the fact tht it coulve been me he cheated on

ryuji: like i didnt hallucinate that, right? he did say he likes me?

ann: he did say that

ryuji: this answers so many questions too

ryuji: shit hindsight is 20/20

akira: hindsight is a slimy bitch and it can go choke

ryuji: ah, there you are. motherf'er.

akira: i didn't want anyone to think i was ignoring you.

ann: oh NOW you CARE what we think????

akira: tell me what you want me to do, ann

akira: do you want me to apologize? to beg? to pay you in cash and also in crepes?

akira: what could i possibly do to make up for the hurt i've caused you??

akira: what the fuck measures up to your feelings???

ann: holy shit

yusuke: I might have misinterpreted the tone, here, but.

yusuke: I think there's one obvious option that you didn't offer, Akira.

akira: im not gonna offer that

ryuji: what offer what

makoto: To break up.

ryuji: what?????

ryuji: with fucking who????

akira: whom.

akira: and that's why i didn't offer

akira: i dont wanna fucking break up. that's not gonna be my call, because i like you and i want to keep dating you.

akira: but if either of you wants to break up, then i'll do that.

akira: for you. not for me.

akira: please.

akira: say something dont leave me hanging here

akira: please just say anything im dying

akira: morgana just sat on my lap and started purring thats how much im freaking out

ann: hold your fucking horses we're in dms

akira: okay thats not terrifying or anything

akira: yusuke you say something, since they're not going to

yusuke: Would it have killed you to communicate a bit more honestly?

akira: i know this was completely avoidable okay im just a dumbass

yusuke: At least you're self-aware.

yusuke: Pardon me, I'm still processing your confession.

akira: fuck i did confess didn't i

akira: and it was the most anticlimactic thing ever shit

akira: i'm sorry, yusuke. you deserve a romantic confession.

yusuke: Do you mean romantic or Romantic?

akira: both either or

akira: i should've confessed in the moonlight with a song and your hand in mine

akira: and also i should've challenged you to a blade duel in the metaverse and only confessed after beating you in a fight

yusuke: Bold of you to assume you could win over me in a fight with blades.

akira: right???? it would've been so fucking badass if i won

akira: perfect opportunity to confess

makoto: Are you guys seriously contemplating romance vs. Romanticism regarding love confessions?

akira: im actually trying to avoid thinking about the current situation so i dont derail into a panic attack but thank you for bringing that up makoto

makoto: How charming.

akira: hhh

akira: are you guys still hashing it out in dms

makoto: No, I think we're quite done.

ann: yep we are

akira: hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhare you gonna tell me the verdict

ann: meet tomorrow on the rooftop before school

akira: how early

makoto: About ten minutes early. This doesn't need to take much time.

makoto: It might, but it doesn't have to.

akira: oh my god if you want to break up with me just do it over text where morgana won't hear it please

akira: don't fucking make me go through a schoolday after you've broken up with me

akira: oh my god say something

akira: please confirm or deny please im begging you

akira: okay that's fair

akira: just

akira: just leave me on read.

akira: goodnight im sorry

  
  
  


akira: can i ask a selfish thing

ryuji: did u really sign off the groupchat just so you could dm me

akira: yes listen

akira: im sorry okay? im really sorry

akira: i fucked up with you, too.

akira: i want to ask a favor but it's really selfish, especially since i'm asking you and i'm asking now

ryuji: what is it

akira: can you come with me to school tomorrow

akira: you don't even have to meet with them at the rooftop just walk me there

akira: and like. catch me if i faint on the way.

akira: please?

ryuji: jeez fine its not like i'll die if i go to school 10mins early

akira: thank you, ryuji.

akira: you're a real bro, you know that?

ryuji: oh thats funny for some reason you made it sound like you didn't want me to be a bro

akira: that's not what i meant

ryuji: no i think you made it clear what you meant

akira: ryuji

akira: ryuji, i would never, in my life, give up a friendship as good as yours just because i have a crush on my friend.

akira: i get crushes on everybody, okay? youre not special for that.

akira: you're special for being my friend, for continuing to be my friend through thick and thin

akira: you're a real bro and i don't think there's another person on this planet that i can tell that to.

akira: maybe ann, but we all saw how well i handled that

ryuji: no that's exactly what i mean

akira: ?

ryuji: you're litrally dating ann. you'd call her your bro. you value hr friendship. all true facts?

akira: all true facts.

ryuji: but you cheat on her.

akira: th

akira: the other way around.

akira: i was dating makoto first...

ryuji: oh just PERFECT then

ryuji: was i going to be your third bitch? one more side piece to fill your time with?

ryuji: did you think for a second that i wouldn't break your spine the moment i figured out you were hurting ann??

akira: no

akira: ryuji

akira: ryuji no that's not it at all

ryuji: then what is it?? what could you possibly have been thinking????

akira: call me

 

Akira picks up before his ringtone has time to sound off. "Hey."

"Don't  _ hey _ me," Ryuji snarls through the phone. "What is wrong with you."

Akira hisses a breath through his teeth. "I never meant to cheat on anyone. I never wanted to hurt them, or you, or anyone else."

"Are you serious right now?" Ryuji snaps. "Just how the eff would you have proceeded, if we hadn't found you out? Still going on two-timing them? What, would you add me to the list as soon as you figured out how you would ask me? Was Yusuke next, or Mishima?" Ryuji slams his hand on something with an audible thud. "Would you effing call me a bro to my face while lying to the entire team?"

Akira holds a hand on his face. "I didn't-- I never lied to anyone-- no no, fuck. I did, I lied by omission, I thought..." He sniffs. "I thought I wasn't lying. I thought I was obvious, I thought everybody could tell. I was  _ stupid, _ Ryuji, stupid enough to think everyone would assume the same things I did."

In his lap, Morgana circles around himself and settles back down, shooting him worried looks.

"And I'm sorry," Akira says. His voice is thick, god he hopes he's still intelligible. "Yes, I probably would have asked you out, but... with the way I was specifically not hiding anything, it wouldn't be long before everyone knew, one way or another. You guys are smart. You'd have figured it out before I asked you."

"You couldn't effin'  _ tell _ me? You couldn't tell your so-called  _ bro _ when you got a date? I would've stopped you on the second one, damn, you could've come clean before this mess even happened."

Okay,  _ now  _ Akira is crying. He's pretty quiet about it, though. "You are too good, fuck, I totally should have, I should have come to you the moment I started dating. Shit. Shitfuck, man." A sob claws its way up his throat. "They're going to break up with me tomorrow, aren't they?"

Ryuji doesn't answer.

"Yeah," Akira says in the face of silence. "I guess I'd wanna break up in person too. But I don't wanna fucking break up, Ryuji. I'm terrified. I like you all so much and now I've hurt you so badly-- shit. We still on for tomorrow?"

"Yeah," Ryuji says. Softly. Almost muffled.

Akira rubs his forehead. He sniffles again. "Do you think they'll at least let me be their friend? And if not that, then could we still be Phantom Thieves together?" He locks eyes with Morgana. "This team is the best thing that's ever happened to me. I've never had so much fun in my life than I do when we're in the Metaverse together."

Morgana butts his little head into Akira's stomach.

"Dude, you're gonna make  _ me _ tear up," Ryuji mutters. "Look, I hear you, alright? I heard your side of the story, though I didn't want to. I see where you're coming from. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

Akira takes a deep breath. "Okay. Goodnight."

He flops back onto his bed.

  
  


Even Sojiro can tell something is wrong in the morning.

On his little mental list of people who can smell the sin on him, Akira moves Sojiro from a possibility to a probability, right up there with Morgana and Kawakami.

  
  


He almost doesn't make it up the stairs to the roof, he's so nervous.

"C'mon, man," Ryuji goes, hoisting Akira up by the arm. "You're almost there."

He is. He sees the door that leads to the roof.

Akira swallows. "Can you hold onto my bag and Morgana for me?"

"Sure," Ryuji says. "I'll wait until the bell rings, okay? You're on your own after that."

"Good luck," Morgana says. "Don't pass out."

"I won't pass out," Akira says, one hand on the door. His voice comes out even, but he can feel himself shaking. He forces in and out a deep breath and walks out to the roof.

Ann and Makoto are standing there, facing the door like they knew he was close.

(They probably did.)

"Good morning," he says.

"Good morning," Makoto replies evenly. "Let's talk."

"Let's," Akira agrees. "I want to listen to what you have to say."

Ann's eyebrows climb up. "Really now?"

"Yeah," Akira says. He drops his eyes to the mess of desk behind them. "I said a lot yesterday. You guys listened, or at least heard me. But you didn't say much, and that's not fair." He looks back up. "I'll listen."

Ann huffs and crosses her arms. "And if we want you to speak?"

"Anything you want."

She scoffs, look off to the side with a snarl.

Makoto straightens nonexistent wrinkles out of her skirt. "Yesterday, you sounded remorseful of your actions, yet unwilling to put a stop to them," she says. "Why does it sound like you're not regretting dating both of us?"

"Because it's the truth," Akira says. "You're both incredible. What I regret is having lied to you. You didn't deserve that."

Ann bites her lip, still looking to the side. "And what about Mishima? Or what you said to Ryuji and Yusuke, for that matter?"

"All true," Akira says. "All true."

"Why did you lie?" Ann says. This is the moment she chooses to turn to face him, and it feels like a punch to his lungs.

"I thought I wasn't," he says honestly. "I never said anything untrue, but there was a lot of stuff I wasn't saying, either. I didn't think I needed to. I thought it was obvious when it wasn't, and I ended up lying by omission." He wants to tuck an apology at the end of his little speech, but he'd hate to overuse the words.

Ann sighs. "So, the problem is...?"

"The problem is, I wasn't being honest. I wasn't communicating enough. Which sucks, especially with you, Makoto, because you always tried to clear things up whenever I was being vague."

Makoto nods. Acknowledging him, at least. "And going forward, what would be the ideal scenario?"

"Right now? Looks like the ideal will be you guys not hating me, and maybe we can continue Thieving." He swallows his nerves. "In general, the ideal would be if I continued dating you two, while also pursuing the others..."

"... Ryuji and Yusuke," Makoto supplies. "And Mishima."

Akira nods.

Ann uncrosses her arms. "Akira..."

Makoto steps forward. "Would you lie about this, again?"

Akira shakes his head. "No."

"Then, if we gave you a second chance?"

He snaps his eyes up to hers. Then he blinks to Ann.

Ann nods.

Akira's mouth hangs open. "If...?"

"If we gave you a second chance," Makoto repeats. "If we didn't break up with you, right now, would you act this way in the future?"

"No, no way," Akira says, shaking his head vigorously. "I'd never. I'd do the opposite. I'd communicate everything before I ever took action. I'd be careful, mindful, I'd never hurt either of you like that. You deserve the world, please, please let me give it to you, I promise I won't pull this shit ever again."

Makoto nods. "Very well." She steps forward, takes his hands in hers.

Akira immediately brings their joint hands up to kiss her knuckles. "Thank you, thank you Makoto, thank you."

She steps to the side.

Ann stands tall, much closer now than she was last time Akira looked at her. "You're a real jerk, you know that?"

"I'm aware," he says. "But I hate being a jerk to you. Let me make it up."

"You owe me so many crepes."

"I'll hand-make you some if that's what it takes." He tentatively knocks at her wrist with his knuckle. "Could you still trust me?"

Ann scoffs with a shake of her head. She tilts her face into his shoulder. "As if I could ever stop trusting you." She takes his hand.

Akira kisses the top of her head.

  
  
  


"I see you're still alive," Morgana says, his bag over Akira's shoulder as he and Ryuji climb down the stairs. "You don't look particularly depressed, either."

"Don't tell me you're doing the stoic thing," Ryuji frowns. "I hate it because you somehow make it work."

"I'm not," Akira says. "I simply have nothing to be depressed about."

"Oh?"

"They're giving me a second chance," Akira nods. "Now, Ryuji, normally I'd celebrate this by trying to settle things with you, but I really need to make amends with the girls first so you're going to have to wait. Sorry, buddy."

"Nah, I get it," Ryuji says. "And I can wait, anyway. I'm not all that angry at you anymore. I mean, I am, yeah, but not as much."

Akira smiles at him, a rare and bright thing that lights up his entire face. "Thanks, man."

"And besides, shouldn't you be worrying about Yusuke or Mishima, instead? You've talked to me already."

"Mishima agreed to give me some time and Yusuke asked for time himself. I'm good."

"Sounds like the stars themselves aligned for you," Morgana sighs. "Just don't do anything reckless, got it? You're seriously worrying me here."

Akira grins. "When have I ever?"

"Joker."

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I'll be good, promise."

"Good. Now get to class."

  
  
  


The problem with class is that Ann sits right in front of him.

Before, he'd enjoy the fact. He's up close and personal to see every flick of her hair, every cross of her legs. Sometimes she'd even glance back at Akira to make sure she had his attention before she did something particularly attractive.

Now, though, she's not doing any of that. She's just trying to exist, and Akira's traitorous brain keeps zeroing in on the stuff she used to display for him.

Her hair.

Her legs.

He wants to throttle the horny demon inside his head, but Incubus does not take the threat seriously and just laughs at Akira instead.

  
  
  


Akira promised crepes, so that's the first order of business.

He doesn't hand-make them, though. He's on a tight schedule. He takes Ann out on a crepe date and it's good enough to fulfill his promise.

"So how come you thought I was with Shiho?" Ann asks between bites of her stupidly sweet crepe.

Akira has a savory one, because he's not a sugar demon. "Have you heard yourself when you talk about her?"

"Well she's my _ friend," _ Ann frowns. "Of course I'll talk about her. I think the problem is that you, mister, never talk about anyone."

Akira sighs. "Yeah, yeah, I know, it would've saved us a lot of trouble if I did."

Ann takes another bite.

"It's... really okay with you, right?" He gestures between them. "This whole thing?"

She swallows her bite. "I'm... a little confused, I gotta admit, but I'm okay with it, yeah."

"No, no that's bad. What's got you confused?"

"Hm... You said you didn't think you were cheating on us because you thought we knew about each other, right?"

"Right. Cheating is, like-- like in a game, cheating is when you break the rules, right? So here the issue isn't that I'm with someone else, it's that I was lying to you about... my relationships, I guess."

Ann taps at her cheek. "Wouldn't I still have gotten angry at you, even if you'd told me? If I'd known from the start that I would be your side piece..."

"You're not," Akira says. "You were never going to be a s-- that's not what I'm talking about here. I like you both very much, and neither of you is less important than the other. Just because I asked you out second doesn't mean you're not the same."

A slow smile curls her lips. "So you're saying, you'd never have a side piece."

"More or less."

"Say it."

He frowns, and that only makes her grin more.

"Side piece," she says again, just to be an asshole.

Akira shakes his head and bites into his crepe.

" 'Kay, 'kay," Ann laughs. "Not making fun of you, I swear. I think it's cute. Chivalrous, even."

Akira chews. "It's disgusting."

"The fact that you won't say the words side piece?"

"The fact that there even are words for it," Akira huffs. "It makes my skin crawl. I can't stand even the thought of cheating, but now I've done it." He looks away.

Ann puts a hand on his elbow. "Hey... It's all good now. We talked it out."

"I don't like this either," Akira says, still unable to meet her eyes. "Don't comfort me, for fuck's sake. I'm supposed to be making it up to you here."

Ann sighs. "Alright..."

Akira shakes his head. "Sorry, this date took a bad turn. How about a movie after this?"

"Actually, I'm busy later. Maybe some other time."

"If you'll have me."

  
  
  


Second order of business is a makeup date with Makoto. The issue with this one is that Makoto hadn't asked for anything specific, so Akira has to get creative.

Makoto had had fun at the arcade that one time, as far as Akira could tell. And though he liked seeing her have fun, it might not be the best type of date for the situation. Arcade games tend to... work up frustration, so to speak. And Makoto wasn't good at them, so it wasn't like she would get that sweet sweet victory mood.

The bookstore is his second thought, but there are just too many ways that could go wrong. They might be done with it in minutes. They might get bored of it. They might not find anything interesting. God forbid,  _ Hifumi  _ might be there.

No, not the bookstore.

It's less than an hour before classes are out, and Akira's beginning to stress. Not  _ panic,  _ he does  _ not _ panic. He is calm. Cool as a rock. He's just... concerned. He wants this date to be good.

Less than an hour. Makoto had said she'd be free right after classes today, no Council business for her.

_ Less than an hour. _

Akira chews on his tongue. He could just bring Makoto back to Leblanc, but that sounds like a bad idea all around. Probably shouldn't drag her to his damn bedroom after that mess. Shouldn't drag her to the place that mess took place, either. Two reasons to stay out of Leblanc.

There's only minutes left on the clock, and, in a fit of what he must now admit is panic, thinks of the batting cage.

  
  
  


Akira has made a mistake.

...Okay, well. He's made several mistakes, up to and including the cheating bullshit.

But he's also made a mistake concerning this date, specifically.

Makoto does not hit a single home run, and yet her swings go hard and fast and Akira misses half of his own, watching her.

The summer uniform is doing Makoto's arms a lot of favors. Her form is awe-striking, and each swing is strong and purposeful, legs up to hips up to torso up to shoulders up to CLANG

Akira is a dead man.

Makoto readies another swing.

Just for a moment, she glances at him and their eyes meet. She hits the next ball a little harder than the rest.

She is  _ definitely _ imagining Akira's head at the end of her bat.

She marches him outside once their time is up, drags him to the nearest alley and shoves him against its wall.

"Can't believe you had the gall to call this a date," she hisses. She crosses her arms.

Akira doesn't dare pick himself off the wall. "I panicked."

"Panic? You?" She scoffs. "You're not convincing me."

She turns her face to the side. Oh--

Akira bites his lip. "But I did. I wanted to find the perfect spot to take you on a date, and nothing I could think of was good enough."

Makoto presses her lips into a thin line. Yes! "And this  _ was?" _

"You had fun, didn't you?" He grins - no one will see, here. "Imagining sport was violence?"

She loses. She brings a hand up to her mouth just a moment too late to hide her smile. Her laugh goes uncovered.

"And, I mean, better than sitting awkwardly at some park somewhere, feeling the violent vibes coming off you in spades and doing nothing about it."

She slaps at his shoulder with her free arm, bowing with laughter. "Stop!"

Akira does not stop. He leans closer to her ear. "I had another thought that would let you work out your frustrations, but I figured you'd actually murder me if I said it out loud."

"I so would," Makoto laughs. For once, she caught the innuendo without needing it explained. She fights to get her breathing under control. "This... was fun, I have to admit."

"Exactly," Akira grins for her. "Coffee?"

She tucks some hair behind her ear. "I'd like that."

  
  
  


It is... infinitely better now than it was before.

Now he can kiss Makoto over Leblanc's counter without making anyone uncomfortable. He can try to kiss Ann after they've taken down a Shadow, even if their masks make it their mission to keep the kiss from happening.

Ryuji is cool with it fast. Akira is grateful, and, after a few days, he is flirty. It takes a little over a week for Ryuji to start responding in kind.

Akira catches Mishima in Shinjuku one evening, and they have a spontaneous date at Chihaya's, which is hilarious for Akira and confusing for the other two. He wonders if they'd ever met before. They hang out so close to each other!

Yusuke takes his sweet time. Honestly, Akira would be losing hope if Yusuke weren't literally asking for time so he could gather his courage. Yusuke's words, not Akira's.

  
  
  


Skull's eyes are drooping, worn out after a number of battles and sleepy with lingering traces of a Dormina he was hit with earlier.

He folds himself over the safe room table and closes his eyes.

Panther makes a face and points at him, asking one of the others to wake him up.

Queen puts her hands up, shaking her head. Mona groans.

Fox looks like he could be persuaded to step in, but Joker doesn't think it'll come to that. He sits himself down in the chair next to Skull and motions for the team to take a break. They'll rest for a while. It's warm in the pyramid, and they're all just a bit sweaty. They might as well.

Fox, instead of taking a seat, pulls off a glove and shoves his hand into the back of Skull's shirt.

Skull jumps up. "Effin cold-- what the hell, man!"

"Don't fall asleep on us," Fox says.

Skull rubs at his neck. "I wasn't! Did you really have to do that?"

"I only wanted to keep you awake."

"No way, you totally just wanted to freeze me. Freaking ice-hands."

Fox pulls his glove back on, an easy smile curling his lips. "Maybe so."

Joker blinks.

  
  
  


Less than an hour later, the team pulls through a particularly tough fight, and they break into cheers, jumping up and down like children in a candy store.

"Hell yeah!" Joker hollers. He picks Queen up and spins her around.

"I can't believe we won that!" she laughs. "We totally pulled through! And that dagger to that poor Shadow's face? Way to go, Joker!"

He laughs. "Me? You nuked them to oblivion! Their damn grandparents felt that! And when Panther--"

He turns to the Thief in question, Queen still held aloft, and his sentence catches itself behind his teeth.

Panther and Fox have both shoved their masks to the ground and are in the process of sucking face.

Skull starts whooping first, and the rest of the team follows. Panther and Fox seperate when Joker puts Queen down to whistle with his fingers. They're all giggling like idiots.

"Alright, alright!" Joker says, trying and failing to sound authoritative through his laughter. "We need to keep going, people!"

But Panther just struts over, still laughing, and trades a quick kiss with Skull, who is also still laughing. It does not work out. They keep laughing. Joker couldn't don a straight face to save his life right now.

Mona transforms into a bus, engine sputtering with laughter. "Get in," he giggles.

"Thank you, Mona, finally someone who can keep on track," Joker says, climbing in.

Fox pops into the passenger seat and grabs Joker's face with both hands, kissing him for just a quick moment.

Mona shakes from side to side. "No making out in the bus!" he laugh-yells.

They don't make out in the bus, but they exchange glances that send them into fits of giggles.

Maybe this Palace won't be so bad, after all.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> of course the first fic i post in a new fandom is polyam again, why am i not surprised  
> i'm making this promise and threat here too: i _will_ make polythieves a common filtered tag. i will i will i will
> 
> [tumblr](http://thephilosophah.tumblr.com/) [twitter](https://twitter.com/thephilosophah)


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